Lots of debate jargon – but any debaters out there will know what I’m talking about.

To the tune of Taylor Swift’s Love Story

We were both frosh, when i first hit you,
I read my case, and the timer starts
Im standing there,
On the podium with time to spare…

read inherency,
read the harms, the plan text,
read the solvency, and then whats next
I say hello, I now stand ready for cross-ex

you were my opponent you were throwing questions,
And your partner read disads about nuke war,
and i was sitting on the side lines preping my 1AR,
And I said:
Cross-apply number one , the status quo is out of whack,
the disads non-unique, without an impact
We outweigh cuz the plan solves mass death
It’s a debate round, judge just vote aff

one year later, i once again hit you,
you hide your case cause you’re dead if we knew,
you close your file,
Stop us prepping for a little while,

You ran counterplans, I had no good answers.
And my coach said stay away from theory args,
But you ran me in a corner,
So I pulled out AT: dispo, and I said

Disregard the counterplan on dispositionality,
Perm: do both, theyre not exclusive mutually.
We outweigh cuz the plan solves mass d.
It’s a debate round, judge just vote for me.

I got tired of losin’, wondering if I were ever going to win.
My speaker points were amusing,
When the judge wrote up his ballot and said…

Reason for decision , the status quo is out of whack,
the disads non-unique, without an impact
The plan outweighs cuz it solves mass death
It’s a debate round, and I vote aff