You might have heard the cookie story: A woman buys a pack of cookies and sits down. As she grabs a cookie from the package on the armrest, the man sitting in the next seat grabs one as well. This continues until only the very last cookie remains. The man splits the cookie and offers her half. By now she has concluded that the man is a total jerk, and huffs away. Later, she realizes the pack of cookies she bought was still unopened in her purse.

(If you haven’t heard the story, you can read the full version here)

Yes, often times we can jump to conclusions about others being a jerk. But sometimes… people are really just jerks. I admire those with the personality that can just let little things slide. I can’t. I dwell on them enough to the point that I have to blog about it.

While waiting for the Blue Man Group concert to start in San Francisco, the women in the theater all decided to use the sole restroom. The line stretched out into the lobby. I walked a path to the end of the line that was perpendicular to the line itself, while at the same time another woman with the same destination walked a path along the length of the line. We reached the end of the line at the same time. Gesturing to let me go ahead, I politely thanked her and took the spot. Five minutes later, she shoves me from behind and yells, “Hey! I was letting you pass, not letting you cut me in the line!”  I should’ve said, “You offered me the spot, and please don’t touch me again.” Instead, I let her push me around (quite literally). I mumbled sorry and walked to the end of the line, which had grown much longer in the five minutes she waited to yell at me.

Adjusting to a new city is difficult. At the very least, I would expect people to follow the laws and thereby give me some sense of predictability. While crossing the street at a traffic light pedestrian crosswalk, a biker suddenly zoomed past and nearly hit me. “Hey man, that’s a red light!” I yelled at him, flustered from the near-miss.  ”Crystal! Shut up!” My boyfriend yelled at me, “You don’t want to start a fight.” That’s what you should do though, fight for yourself, and don’t let anyone prevent you from doing so. A world where people run red lights? Where are we, in a developing region of Asia?

This weekend I wanted to buy some postcards from this new city, so I stepped in a gift shop. The owner sharply informed me that she didn’t have change and did I have small bills. I asked my friend to borrow some cash, and he placed the bills onto the counter. The owner scowled something that I didn’t hear, so I asked her to repeat herself. “It’s disrespectful to throw money at people.” Well, it’s also disrespectful to lecture your customers. If I were less of a wuss, I would’ve taken my ‘disrespectful’ money and my business elsewhere.

Today I was eating lunch on a bench. Two students passed by and threw their bottle into the trashcan right next to me and missed. The bottle rolled under my bench. They walked away. I threw away their trash. Not only jerks, but also inconsiderate of the environment and lazy.

The list could go on and on, but these are the first examples that pop into my head. We were all raised to be considerate of others, and I’m sure no one purposefully tries to be inconsiderate, yet why are there still so many jerks out there? I guess the conclusion isn’t that they are jerks, but rather that they are idiots.